Vulgar...

I have been too busy busy busy since coming back..
But I want to record the following:

1. En showed me his vulgar sign on 16 April, rather innocently, of which I told him if I ever see him do that ever again, I will put him on the naughty seat as it is a bad sign which will offend others.
He seemed shocked at my response, and would not tell me where he learnt the vulgar sign from...

2. On the positive sign, while I was coming back and stuck at the China customs (that is another colourful story), I learnt that En was crying and crying, seated on his sofa when He heard that, worried sick over whether Rui and I will be able to come home.

3 On the same evening that he was worried if i was able to return, he sat on his sofa and thought for a while, and asked my mum..
"Mummy's birthday over already?"
Yes, mu mum answered, though my next birthday will come next year.
En thought for a while and said, "I want to buy flowers, make nice nice in paper and send to mummy."
My mum was puzzled why he would want to send, when i am around but he insisted that the flowers have to be sent. When my mum told him that if he will behave himself and fight less with Di-di, I will be very happy even without the flowers, En apparently pondered for a while, then asked my mum seriously, "You sure?" hhahahaha, that makes me laugh more than anything else.

4. Xuan has been babbling lots and seemed to have grown up suddenly. at 27 month, he just started articulating comprehensible words, but many of which are still just... babble. however, he is a most funny child, ever ready to dance to music and make funny expressions, such as putting both hands on his cheek and make funny faces at me.

His cognitive skill seemed to also bemore developed than we anticipated, because when the confinement aunty returned to Singapore ahead of me, when Xuan first saw her, he went to her and asked, "where, baby?". he shocked everyone as no one really think that he would understand what is happening in the house, much less recognise the fatc that aunties looks after baby and has gone to china with baby...

5. We realise we may have been depriving Xuan of new toys as I noticed that he treated a cheap SGD 2 dollar bear pencil case we got for him from china really preciously. He hugged it everywhere he goes, like his Thomas trains that are only his, and when I saw him take the bear and point to the sofa seat, and proceeded to bring the bear there to seat the bear on the seat, arranging the body of the bear nicely so that the bear sits nicely and squarely on the seat, my heart went out to him..

This little bear, which was a whim purchase by the by and not even intended originally for him (but brought back to Singapore with the intention to avoid having him fight with En whom we bought a similar rabbit pencil case and who really needed a pencil case more than Xuan), was just a 2 dollar cheap purchase for me.
But for Xuan, the little boy who mostly had hand me downs and not much new toys (since we have aroomful of toys), to him, the bear is a precious and cherished gift from us.

6. Both Xuan and En were caring towards Rui most of the times, eager to play with him by making funny faces, or gently touching Rui's hands. BUt Xuan surprised us most, when he gave up his "royal sofa seat" which he always sits on for his TV shows for Rui to lie. He pointed to his seat and said "Didi" and he promptly went to sit on the seat next to it, willng to give up his seat (Which apparently no adult could sit on without being chased away by him) to baby Rui.

7. En is also caring and loving towards Xuan. When grandparents bought Xuan his new precious crocs with Thomas add ons, En kept Xuan's shoes in the house, claiming that "because Didi's shoes are new". When Popo asked him what aout his own shoes, why are they left outside the house, he replied that "his shoes are old, so can leave outside" O_O

8. baby Rui is hefty 7 plus kg at 3 months (for the record, En is over 15 kg at 40 plus mths), and a very swet baby who has learnt to sleep thru the night from 8 pm - 4 or 5 am. and when awake, he is always cooing and babbling and never fails to give us a smile when we play with him..

A month away, I come back filled with stories as well as little observations of how much the kids have grown. and how each of them brings me a different kind of joy. I am really savouring it, as I am forever worried that these moments slipped by too fast for me to catch them and hold them in my palms for just a tiny little while...

Days of Madness in beijing..

I have not been blogging cuz I was/ am sick sick with Mastitis..

And had the experience of my life "experimenting" with the different hospitals in China...

It started mild enough, some pain and fever, and we went AnE in the evening 2 Sundays ago when my fever went up to 40 and i was having both the fever and the chills (yes, never knew tat's possible!)

And at the hospital, a public but specialist hospital for Maternity, females and kids, the system was chaotic. I thought that is typical of the Chinese chaos anyway, until we went to the expat hospital and you realised the difference. 

Well but we are trying to acclimatise here right, and to be fair, this is the only hospital where they specialise in lactation services. No other hospitals I went to subsequently has massage/ laser light therapy or even daily consult with the doctors specialising in mastitis.. (yes they have that, apparently so common in China that every hospital i go to, I see fellow females seeking treatment for the

 same ailment.. I blame the winter.. which probably made our milk ducts contract or something...  though NJ say I am crazy to think this way since he says our body temperature remains the same and we not cold blooded - well maybe I am leh... doctor verify pls..)

In the hospital, they make u pay for EVERY minor procedure.. at every point. Supreme division of labor if some sociologists want to study the system.. no collation of payment at the end of the day.. and u run around this like 4 tower building for all the difference processes - payment, blood test, labs, Q for consult, the Consult, meds, therapy, masage, photoray etc..

it is rather exhausting. When my condition deteriorated, cuz the doctor only prescribed like 3 days of anti biotics since I refused to be warded, the condition worsened when the antibiotics stopped. 

So i have to go back and succumed to the drip.

And that was another nightmare, they dun ve beds to ward me, so i have to be on day drips.

I go into an open area, i mean really open ok... with different stations for pumps, photo ray and massage all in the same tiny room with no demarcation and you are supposed to just take off your tops for the treatment (china apparently has no respect much for urm.. privacy? - thank god I am Hungary trained when it comes to public baths, if all females, i am not that bothered seriously, but still it seemed a bit crazy to me)

then I went for day trips where the nurse, while efficient, just abuse the patients..

Ok, how so? Check out the conversations I overhear while seated in an uncomfortable chair bearing out the 3 bottles of drip on a 5 hr period..

Incident 1: "you scared of pain?" said the nurse to the patient who came in for an injection of some sort in her tummy. "Then you want kids or not? want to deliver babies or not? If you want, then scared of pain for what..." DUH DUH... for info, until my surgery, My previous 2 births are pain free ok. Even when the nurses draw blood at the hospital, they are v careful when I told them I am totally non pain tolerant...

Incident 2: A fellow mastitis mum had allergic reactions to the drip and was taken off the same drip that i am going thru quickly. she had shortness of breathe and was rescued by the nurses and doc - at her seat. OK.. then she was asked to go home as she could not take the drip treatment anymore. However, she was very weak from the reaction she had to the drip and could not get up. 2 hours later, while she was still resting there, the nurse walked by and said "you are still here? Still cannot get up and walk yet?" In a loud and "why are you still here kinda tone" - DUH! People pay to be on the treatment, now cannot go thru treatment, just got rescued and this is your bedside manner? DUH DUH DUH..

Incident 3: Husband overheard this conversation... 

A pregnant lady on drip was really feeling uncomfortable, retching into a bag, and accompanied by her mother in law.

The nurse went over to chat, found out she is pregnant and said to the mother in law that some months back, there was also another pregnant lady, and she lost her baby after that... DUH!!!!

It is simply atrocious. and very RIDICULOUS lor.

The next day, I dreaded going back, but had to as there was some reduction in the pain and I thought, perhaps the drip was working..

However, when I went in at 10, the same nurse was not around, she strolled in leisurely some couple of minutes later, but with a crowd at her heels all awaiting to be put on drip as well.

She got hassled and started complaining about patients who come all at once, at 10 am (she is due for lunch at 1130) who should have come earlier.. (duh, is it not her job?!!!) 

I sat down, wanted to give her my meds (3 huge drip bottles lor), she chased NJ out of the room, and I waited. I waited and waited, while she put all the other patients who came after me on drip first. I asked for assistance and she asked me to wait. So i i still waited while watching the minutes go by, acutely aware that she will go for lunch and if I finish the drip by 1, and she is not around, I dunno who will help me. 

NJ came in the room 3 times to make sure I was ok, but was appalled to see me still waiting. 

And the stupid nurse had to cheek to complain about spouse who keep coming in 3 times. I wanted to scream at her and said, given he came in 3 times, you still have yet to put me on drip despite me coming here first, and knowing I am a foreigner!! I tried to stay cool, and waited.. increasingly impatient and frustrated.

I saw her blame a patient for having thick veins or something which led to her not being able to insert the drip. And she had to poke the other hand twice. I think she was just taking out her harrasssment and frustration on the patients.

When the clock showed 10:30 and I am still not served, I got up, stormed to the door and turned around and said, "If you are not helping me, I am getting out of here."

I saw all the patients looking shocked, but none as shocked as her. 

I stalked out of the room., slammed the door and dumped all the meds in the dustbin and stormed off.

We went off to the Sino-Japanese Hospital after that and it was a DRAMATICALLY nicer experience. The bed sheets looked cleaner, registration was prompt, and I did not have to wait, the nurses who are competent and conversant in various languages including Japanese will ask about the condition, and assign a relevant doctor who will come down to a central comfortable waiting area and look for the patient. WIN!!! I no longer had to run around different buildings as I just wait in the same place.

This is the hospital assigned to Olympics Atheletes and I do think they know how to serve international patients who are really sick and lost. Imagine me at the earlier hospital in AnE running at 40 degree fever and still asked to run around to pay, different building for different diagnosis (if NJ was not with me and I had to do that alone, i would have collapsed with exhaustion and killed by watever ailment I had)

But wait, the best part was this - when the doctor at the Sino- Japanese hospital saw my medical and treatment history, he actually said the drip i was given was not "safe"... sigh.. it was a nightmare which I am too glad to be out of..

I went back subsequently for treatment, drip on 1 day and insisted on anti-biotics later and saw an specialist who diagnosed other problems on me quite accurately which I will have to follow up in SG, I am glad to be well again. Seriously. 

I had to sign on papers to say i do not want a IV drip treatment, but other than that, all was well, the nurses were especially attentive. And the best part was, my entire treatment is CHEAPER here at the better grade hospital (cuz I recovered faster) than at the disasterous one!!

A lesson i learnt is once we reach certain standards for fundamentals like healthcare, education etc, there is simply NO TURNING BACK. I tried to acclimatise, but it is a backward system which I simply find NOT acceptable!

hence, well, in health and in education, money pays and buys the best we can afford. It is a true fact and I have learnt my lesson well.

Am happy to out the saga behind me, with much colourful stories to tell back in Sg and ppl coming to China, and well, we do have happy moments after I recovered. More on that later, but for now, pics of Rui in China!!!