My Musing About Parenthood

Check out this video we captured over the weekend..

Again, one of many En's spontaneous moments, and we were glad we had the camera ready..
It captured En's innocence and Baby Xuan's contentment to just lie in bed while his brother shows off his antics...



It is tough and challenging handling these 2 highly demanding babies.. especially now that, Ling Jie the confinement lady, is gone, but lovely moments like these make it all worth while..

Sometimes I think the reason I cope better with Xuan is largely cuz of En. With him around, he provides the entertainment and antics which constantly reminded us that the hardship of parenthood has its returns... Back when I had only En, one of my main grouses was "the baby was so stoic and non-responsive, how can anyone say that parenthood is rewarding, worthwhile etc etc.." and I was highly cynical and skeptical that all the laurels piled on the concept of parenthood were just marketing spins and gimmicks...

But as Celest-al constantly cheered me on back then, she kept saying that it will get better once the baby is older and true enough, now as En gets older everyday, the time spent with him are really more enjoyable and fun and importantly, FUNNY...

So now that I have tasted the fruits of painful labour (pun intended), perhaps, I am better able to take all the pains in strides, as I know that the better days are ahead and they will come.. once Xuan gets older and more animated, we are gonna get double the joy and fun..

Now, I am not saying that being parents are all that blissful, joyful and easy.. It is not. It is really horrendously painful, tiring, highly effort and time consuming and is just one of the toughest and bloodiest job ever in this world, and as one Baby Blues comic very aptly puts it - "Motherhood (in this case, i will include the dad to make it Parenthood) is not for WIMPS", nor the WEAK I will add..

I am now, here typing away, after barely 4 hrs of full sleep for the last 2 nights, but my body is slowly adjusting to the hours.. and just like any tough job, the payback can be, and will be, good to make it all worthwhile..

There are still days in which I still feel like crying, moments when I am immensely frustrated and full of angst, but the little lovely moments like the ones in the video wipes out all that..

I have learnt that in Parenting, the balance sheet never balances and an accountant will always lose, because while the bad stuff always run up to be more on one side, the little grains and nuggets of good stuff just tip the balance and all is well again... That is the way of parenthood, and a reality.

I used to question all the good stuff that some people say, I used to be such a cynic, that I thought that parents always said the good stuff or made parenthood look saintly and jolly cuz they were stuck in that rut, so what else can they say right.. now I know how ignorant I was.. But it is no fault of mine seriously.. Because, Nature always win, and parenthood is one of those stuff, where the golden moments and rewards are only realised and tasted, when one throws oneself in it.. you can't stand by the pool and expect the miracles of joy to be revealed, they will only be revealed to those who are already in the game... and Take this from me, I know better now because I am in it.