I HATE Breastfeeding...

So Here Goes, as Promised. And even if I get flamed for this entry, so be it. Flame me!
There are so many evangelists of breastmilk mums out there. I cannot fight them all, but I just want to share my experience and perspective.

So Breastmilk (BM) is the best and Formula Milk (FM) is the ultra low second class substitute.
But in a sense, i wonder if it is all a matter of marketing and hype.

The Social Historical context

In the 70s, FM was touted as the best, it was recommended and endorsed by doctors. Beyond that, it was also a symbol of wealth, only those who cannot afford it will drink breastmilk. So drinking free BM is like not being able to afford the best for your kid.

Fast forward now to the millennium - Breastmilk is touted as THE BEST. It has all those stuff that FM dun have, some research showing that Breastfed kids are more intelligent, BM helps prevent numerous allergies and illnesses etc etc. All the laurels that are heaped on BM these days are endless, leaving all mums in distress if our babies do not drink BM.

So did the goodness of milk change over time? Or has the definition of good milk changed?

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The Paradox in The Production of BM

In order to produce more BM, one has to feed or express every 2 hours, in order to stimulate the milk flow and to tell our brain the amount of BM we need. It is a demand and supply issue, the lesser times you latch the baby on or pump, your brain will decode it as no need to work so hard to produce breastmilk.

Yet, there are other factors affecting the production of breastmilk, most critically, having adequate rest and not to be stressed.

New mum, with a new baby - how not to be stressed?
And if you can't sleep more than 2 hours for day and night, or even if the feed is 3 hours apart, can get enough rest meh? Not enuf rest and highly stressed, then how?!

If i think rest is important, and I sleep through the night from 12 - 6, then I will have missed 3 feeds, and BM supply will drop = not enough milk to meet baby'e need, then how?

If I pump every 2 hrs, but no rest, also end up not enough milk to feed baby!! How!!

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Conveniences of BreastFeeding - A myth

Many conveniences were attributed to Breastfeeding as opposed to bottle feeding.
E.g. Save $$ on bottles, no need to wash and sterilize bottles.

But my 2/3/4 hour apart feeding and pumping experience was total inconvenience.
Short of being chained to the baby 24/7, I can't do much else as I am always in a rush home to feed or to pump. And stress is no good (see earlier point).

So all of one's activities have to include baby then or else cannot do anything. Die lah.
But yet, all the psychologists will counsel stressed and depressed mum the importance of ME-time. And that it is important for couple to have time away from baby - how to do that when you are on a 2-3 hour curfew? So rushed and scared that not in time to go home feed baby, where got mood to do what?!!!

So contradicting right!! So in the real world, breastfed mummies are just chained to the baby, period. How convenient is that really!

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Quality of BreastMilk - Questionable

While many laurels are piled on BM, sometimes we seem to forget that quality BM needs certain conditions to be in place.

Studies have shown that a mum's emotions can affect the babies through Breastfeeding and breastmilk. The diet of the mum is also instrumental in ensuring quality breastmilk.

So, if the emotional condition of the mum is not ideal, e.g. stressed, frustrated, esp. when the mum returns to work, can the BM still be superior? Won't all the bad vibes go into the milk at all?

And if the mum does not monitor the diet closely, again when she goes back to work and eat junk (as we all are apt to do), then how can the BM be superior?

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Hence my conclusion is - DO your best and then supplement if need be. Especially for babies with jaundice, pls do not forcefeed the issue of breastfeeding, there are dire consequences, see my personal experience and others.

As in all things, we know when we have tried our best. If I have woken up every 2 hours to pump and feed and my supply is still not enough to stock the fridge, not enough it will be.

Do not undermine my formula fed baby. BECAUSE the effort that I spent pumping is no less than other mothers. I recently watched a program on parenthood on Channel 8, where the mum featured has a fridge full of breastmilk, I was watching that while I was expressing my pathetic 90ml per pump BM, I felt really demoralised and depressed. I told Hubby seated beside me that by virtue of that show, I should stop.

Cuz the same efforts that I put in to pump yielded so much less output. Such programs make breastfeeding seem so easy. And they cast unrealistic expectations and pressure on the mums. But i know I am smarter than to fall for such marketing gimmicks / propaganda

But I am continuing to feed and pump till now still, because on the day that I stop breastfeeding or pumping totally, I want to be able to say with a clear conscience that, "Baby, Mummy has really tried my best to provide you with the best". And baby will just have to live with that and be happy with or even be proud of that. Because he will also learn that in this world, the effort to try and persevere, is a greater virtue than just looking at results and outputs. Let's not be that shallow.

With this, I rest my case, and in the near future, rest my pump.